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Gay bars in Albania

Located in southeastern Europe, Albania is a country that borders Greece and is a large area. The capital city, Tirana, is a large city that is home to more than 600,000 of the 3.6 million people that make up the population of Albania.

At the moment there are no gay bars in Albania or gay clubs in Albania, but I am sure that as cities expand and the country grows economically, gay bars and clubs will eventually appear in Albania. There are still plenty of places to go and plenty of sights to see here in Albania and you’ll probably want to head to the capital Tirana for all the exciting sights and events.

Tirana is a big city and has a wide variety of bars and clubs for the public. Most of the bars and clubs in the area are gay friendly, as are the restaurants and cafes available. For a quiet evening, you’ll want to head somewhere like the Buddha Bar, which is a popular bar with a relaxed atmosphere. The staff are extremely attentive and the bar is dimly lit so it can be quite romantic – there are sofas and ottomans to lounge on and they play a wide variety of relaxing music.

For a more fun evening, if you really want to let loose, then Flares may be more your scene. This great bar is owned by Denis and Nardi and they work very hard to make this bar as welcoming as possible. Fun-filled events include karaoke and you won’t want to miss this. The bar can get very busy on the weekends, but you’re unlikely to mind. You’ll be served quickly and when the karaoke isn’t on, you can kick back and listen to great music.

We offer our users a list of all gay bars and clubs in Albania and invite you to view photos and locations of places in our listings.

Select an RV

My wife and I were recently discussing our upcoming long-term tour of the country. I will be 62 years old and we have both dreamed of traveling the country and seeing everything we have always wanted to see. We own 32ft. travel trailer and a dual Dodge 3500 diesel engine that we would be towing it with. For some reason, I started to think that it would be nice to get a Class A. Apparently, she had been thinking the same thing. So we went to the distributors.

Having no idea what to look for, what kind of budget would be needed for the platform, or even operating costs, we decided it would be a good idea to ask as many questions as possible. We are not new to the RV world, having lived full time in a fifth wheel for 10 years has taught us a lot. We are familiar with the problems of freezing water lines, tank discharge, assembly and disassembly. How to save storage space and purchases while living on a budget. So we knew what we wanted inside. But an A-Class is totally different from a fifth wheel on the outside.

We had to look at things differently going out on the road. Our current fifth wheel is 42 feet. length. It is a toy transporter or a garage unit. The rear of 14 feet. it was used as an office instead of transporting toys (motorcycles, ATVs, etc.). Outside storage was simply the basement area. With a Class A you have much more storage space. But even that seemed to raise questions. Why did some models offer transfer and others not? Why do some models have a lot of storage space and others do not? Also, almost all Class A RVs have a generator, why? What kind of maintenance do they need? How big would we need? How long will it work etc? It seemed that the more we started looking, the more questions we had. So the really important question, gasoline or diesel.

We really needed to narrow down the selection and get an idea of ​​the costs of an A-Class. If you’ve looked around the A-Class, you know that diesel units cost more than gas units. Sometimes much more. But are they worth it? Our first problem was actually justifying a Class A on top of the platform we already have and pay for. My son answered that. His feelings were that a Class A offered more options. If he’s on the road and it broke down, he had his TOAD (because he towed behind the Class A to get around town) that he could unhook and drive to get help. Second was storage. Regardless of the type of Class A (petrol or diesel), it still has a lot more storage space than a travel trailer. The operating costs of a Class A compared to the truck and trailer are also better. My truck gets an average of 8 MPG towing the trailer. A Class A diesel is about the same. But once camped my car (TOAD) gets 30 MPG and the truck 16 MPG. Gasoline is currently 30 cents a gallon cheaper than diesel. Our total travel cost would be cheaper.

Next was the size of the platform. We found that if you’re going to keep your camping expenses down, your best bet was national and state parks along with dry camping. Many parks have a limit on the size of platform they will allow. The closer you get to 40 feet, the more parks you limit yourself to. 36 feet seems to be a sweet spot. Plenty of storage space and convenience and small enough to fit in the maximum number of places. It’s funny how a little information can go a long way. Just knowing that we wanted to stay around 36 feet. helped eliminate many of the platforms.

So now to tackle the big problem, gasoline or diesel. At first, this seemed like an easy problem. Gasoline is cheaper, gasoline-powered RVs are cheaper. All Class A offered a comfortable ride. All Class A offered enough storage space. Having worked on engines in my youth, I knew that a gasoline engine would not have the life of a diesel, but I also knew that I could rebuild or replace them fairly cheaply when the time came. SO gas was… but why were diesels much more in demand? That bothered me, so I started asking questions. Diesels seem to get better mileage, get up and down the mountains more, have more towing capacity, have better basement (storage) areas, and generally last much longer. When I applied my math skills to the numbers, it turned out that diesels had a lower operating cost, better resale value, and lasted longer than gasoline RVs. Now I was really torn, gasoline or diesel? Enter my son-in-law, mechanic. He had a simple tip…get a diesel. They’re quieter (the engine is usually in the rear), they come with a bigger generator (more electric to run things), and they’ll last forever. Now we knew what to start narrowing down our search to. A diesel rig about 36 feet long.

Living space has always been a concern for me. Sometimes it makes me a little claustrophobic. Add a few people in a small space (think elevator) and I’m close to losing it sometimes. So living in an 8 foot wide house on wheels could be a problem. The answer is to slide out. Diesel RV can have a lot of slippage. These expand the interior room quite a bit. But the more slides, the more expensive the unit and the more potential problems. After some thought, we decided that two slides would suffice and a large slide in the living room would be our minimum. After all, we only sleep in the bedroom. But we eat, read, entertain and relax in the living room.

We no longer have children living with us so our next thought was a single room. Then the mother-in-law said that she would love to travel around the country. My wife also mentioned the fact that she would love for the grandchildren to travel with us from time to time. I know that some of you also have children that you can’t leave at home (although you may sometimes want to). We saw some Class A that have bunk rooms and they were actually very nice. That can be an option.

It was time to look at the budget. We had a basic idea of ​​what we now wanted in an RV. The problem became how much we wanted to spend and whether we could afford to buy what we needed.

I’ve always had expensive taste. Going to RV shows, I quickly learned that if the price of the RV was under $300,000, I really didn’t seem to like it. I also knew we couldn’t afford $300,000 on a new RV. Sitting down with the budget and financial information, we discovered what we could afford. We have a slightly different situation than most of you and it is a pending settlement of an insurance claim for my wife. For us, the deal will be a determining factor in how much equipment we can buy. But by now, we knew that a new computer was not in question, a used one would have to work.

New set of problems. Used means someone else’s problems. Now there are all kinds of things you can do to limit the problems you run into. Insurance and aftermarket warranties, good reviews before the sale by a qualified mechanic, talk to the previous owner, buy as new as possible, read opinions on forums, ask questions of professionals and users. In short, do as much research as you can.

So how is it used? Doing research on the web, you can find all kinds of used Class A platforms. Some with very low mileage. All different sizes and all different ages. Taking my list of requirements, I started looking at local dealerships, then eBay, then web searches. I can tell you this; there is no shortage of Class A diesel RVs for us to look at. Good Sams will cover a platform up to 14 years old. But every year it becomes more expensive. So you can cover yourself from major problems.

So there you have it, how to select an RV. With a lot of research and a little luck, you can find the perfect gear for your travels. Decide what you need, what you want, and what you can afford. Then look at local dealers so you can see what they say you must have versus what you want. Then search the web for units in your price range.

There are plenty of good quality checklists on the web to use to see your dream RV once you’ve narrowed down a few. Use them too. Do you know a good mechanic? Take it with you; It never hurts to have an impartial eye on an important purchase.

Tips for throwing the perfect summer pool party

When the sun is hot and you want to stay cool, don’t give it a second thought, just head to the pool! Summer is in full swing and taking a break from the hustle and bustle of routine life to enjoy a pool party is the best way to have a good time. Hosting an evening at the sizzling pool for your near and dear ones will not only speed up relationships but also rejuvenate your mind. Oh, you already know everything! Can’t wait to have fun in the sun? Check out the tips below to throw a ‘splashtastic’ poolside party like a pro!

Who’s on the guest list?

“Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who should I invite out of all of them?”

Sure, you know hundreds of people, including your neighbors, colleagues, friends, and family, and you can’t invite them all! If you do, you’ll go bankrupt! Clear your confusion by creating a list of people you know. Once you have all the names, just narrow down your guest list to close! Having people from different groups would liven up the whole tone of your party! You can send them personalized invitation cards or call them directly. However, a special treat during a call is sure to make them smile.

Set the right mood with tropical décor

Of course, a poolside party would need the right kind of decorations that can bring out the party animal in all of us. There is nothing better than a tropical theme when you want to transform your space into an oasis. Be sure to choose beach-inspired accents like vibrant lanterns, faux palm trees, colorful throw pillows, and seashells to get the eclectic bohemian look.

Fashion pool toys

One thing you can’t live a summer pool party without is definitely pool toys! Go grab some cool water guns, beach balls, inflatable loungers, pool floats, beach umbrellas and enjoy the party to the fullest!

The belly rules the mind

Once you’re done with the decorations, it’s time for you to make the proper arrangements for the food. Beacon, steaks, pizza, and hotdogs on the menu sound like fun, right? Mute! Don’t think about opting for heavy foods unless you want your guests to fall asleep and ruin your party! We suggest you choose healthy snacks and snacks to keep the party excitement going throughout the day!

Rules the pool keeping it cool

Refreshing drinks are a must to stay hydrated in the scorching sun! Intensify the fun of your party by serving cold cocktails. Take various seasonal fruits and blend them to make fresh drinks to quench your guests’ thirst. You can also give your cocktails a twist by mixing them with margarita and tequila. Serve with love! Health!

The playlist is important

Music is the true crowd pleaser at any shindig. If you want your guests to go crazy with your party, you have to put on some great music! If you have any confusion regarding songs, check out the trending funky songs on the internet and create an amazing playlist without any hassle.

Exciting game of volleyball

May everyone enjoy a little more than they expected by organizing a game of pool volleyball. Simply spread a net across the center of your pool, form two teams, and you’re good to go!

sun protection station

Now that everything is set and you are ready to host the most memorable summer pool party, we want to remind you of something very important. Partying in the sun is fun, but your delicate skin can be seriously affected if you forget to use sunscreen. You should set up a sun protection station by the pool to make sure everyone is protected from the sun while the party goes on. Your guests will definitely thank you!

everyone loves surprises

Last but not least, end the party by handing out dry towels to your guests. When your guests start to get out of the pool, give them towels to dry off. You can entice them even more by adding a personal touch. For that, you need to get some fresh towels that have their names written on them. This sweet gesture is sure to make the event memorable!

conclusion

We hope you enjoyed reading our tips! Experiment with the ideas above and let us know how your pool party goes. Happy summer!

Avoiding Mr. Wrong: The 9 Men Single Women Should Avoid

There are two types of Mr. Wrongs. The first is the man who lacks the personal skills to have a healthy relationship. If you choose to commit to him, you must understand that he is not capable of emotionally connecting with you, your children, or your family. Therefore, you must be willing to live with this and accept it. The second type is a man who might be Mr. Wrong to you, but Mr. Right to someone else. He is able to emotionally connect with a woman, her children and her family. However, there may be that little voice inside you that tells you that something is not quite right… for you. The end result, as wonderful as it may be, if it doesn’t fit your relationship criteria, or if something is missing, then that makes him Mr. Wrong for you.

Although the world is full of Mr. Rights (fun loving, romantic, charming, strong and adventurous men) who are looking for the right woman, there are some men who will always be wrong for you. The Mr. Wrong you want to avoid is the man who isn’t looking, isn’t capable, and isn’t interested in a meaningful relationship with you. Below is a list of men who are wrong for the right reasons:

mr married

There is a married man who will pursue you as if he were single. He will flirt, buy you gifts and take you out to lunch. He will call you, email you, and make plans to be with you. However, he will not be able to take you out to dinner, the movies or the ballet. Neither will he be able to kiss you, touch you, or woo you in public.

The bottom line is this: a worthwhile woman doesn’t take things that don’t belong to her. Period.

The player

The player is amazing and the first to admit it. He is very independent and can take care of his needs on his own. In fact, he doesn’t even need you to have sex. He always has a woman willing and waiting to be his spoils.

The player is constantly meeting new women. He lives to play and plays to live. And when he is done playing with you, he will scroll down his phone list, connect and start the game again. It’s who he is and what he does.

mr addiction

When a man doesn’t live up to his own expectations, he often becomes addicted. Addiction is the coping mechanism he uses to deal with internal emotional pain. His addiction allows her a temporary escape from the real world and a means to suppress her feelings for him. Sadly, Mr. Addiction has lost touch with those he loves and those who love him. Even more tragic, he has lost touch with himself.

Until he seeks help, Mr. Addiction will shower you with romance and flowers, but not a future. Over time, he will be overwhelmed by her mood swings, depression, and his love of drugs, alcohol, porn, or power.

The liar

The liar will look you right in the eye and tell you everything he knows you are waiting to hear.

First, never believe what a stranger tells you. This is the biggest mistake women make. Second, stop being so gullible. And third, start taking responsibility for the men you meet.

The liar has a major character flaw: he can’t tell the truth! You just can’t help it when it comes to little white lies and exaggerations. After he is eventually caught, he is a master at convincing you that it really wasn’t his fault. For example, if you hadn’t left him alone to visit your parents for the weekend, he would never have gone to the club and slept with his ex.

the deceiver

Unlike the liar, who is honest in the fact that he knows it is wrong not to tell the truth, the deceiver lies to himself. In fact, The Deceiver is a man who has no idea who he really is, so he lives the life of the man he would like to be.

The deceiver is a master at luring you into what you think is a meaningful relationship. And truth be told, he thinks that’s what he wants too. The problem is that he has spent his life pretending to be someone he is not. So it only makes sense, if he doesn’t know who he really is, then he doesn’t really know what he really wants. He is unable to fall in love, settle down and commit to a woman. Rather, he wanders aimlessly from one meaningless encounter to another in search of what he doesn’t even know he’s looking for.

The Deceiver seduces you with fabulous music and promises of romantic getaways. This man will invite you, he will dine with you and even pray with you. But once he has attracted you and had sex with you, he leaves you in the worst way.

The Impostor is probably the most difficult Mr. Wrong to identify. That’s why you should go slow, abide by the general dating rules, and trust your gut when your internal alarm goes off and tells you something isn’t right.

The stalker

The bully attacks you with insulting comments, then quickly backs off and smiles. If you have to ask yourself this question, “I wonder, did I just get insulted or not?” then you are probably dating a bully. He wouldn’t let someone walk up to him and punch him in the stomach, but the bully deals an emotional blow to his self-esteem.

seperate lord

Mr. D. walks into your life and blows your mind. He wins you over with his wit, charm and personality. Before you know it, he has captured your heart. Suddenly, having won the prize, he stops playing.

Unfortunately for you, when the honeymoon ends, so does the relationship. Once it has worked to get you, it becomes unresponsive, unavailable, and withdraws completely. Mr. D. is hardworking, responsible, and personable at work. At home he is a different man. It’s not that he doesn’t want to be intimate with you, it’s that he doesn’t know how. Even he doesn’t understand how disconnected she is from his life.

Unfortunately, a relationship with Mr. Separated is very lonely. You see, even when he’s there, he’s gone.

sir maybe

Take a big red pen and write Mr. Maybe’s name and put a big question mark next to his name. Because that sums it up. Maybe call. Maybe he will send an email. Maybe he will think of you. But he maybe he won’t. If Mr. Maybe doesn’t know what he wants, then he probably doesn’t know what he has.

Mr. Maybe’s lack of commitment is annoying. Maybe you should move on?

mr bounce

…is a man with a broken heart. He has lost love through death, divorce, or breakup. Given time and space, Mr. Bounce could be someone’s Mr. Perfect. He just needs time to regroup. Until he has sorted out his emotional baggage, Mr. Bounce will rarely commit to the first women he dates after a breakup.

At first everything seems normal. That is, until his feelings settle down, his thought process resets, and he realizes that he made a mistake by getting involved too soon. Unfortunately, most men don’t know how to fix his broken heart. So instead of fixing what’s broken, he just goes out and finds another partner.

The easiest way to discover a Mr. Wrong is to not have sex with him. A man who is interested in a meaningful relationship will be interested in getting to know you as a person. He will care about your likes and dislikes. He will be looking for ways to please you. If, after spending some time getting to know you, and he sees the possibility that you are “the one,” then he will respect your decision to wait for physical intimacy. Mr. Right is looking for an intimate and emotionally connected relationship; therefore, he is willing to wait for a worthwhile woman.

Automatically boost your own trading results with your knowledge of candlestick reversal patterns

The first thing to understand about Japanese candlesticks is that they are champions at detecting trend changes. The second is to always use them in conjunction with your favorite variety of reliable indicators. The third thing is to know that when used in conjunction with the Indicators, they reflect the underlying psychology of the traders, as a group (or herd, if you prefer). The fourth thing is to memorize the 15 or so candlestick reversal patterns. That’s easy, and you should put your mind to it.

My all-time favorite of all the candlestick reversal patterns is the shooting star. After a long uptrend, it appears high up in the sky, above previous prices, all alone. It looks a lot like a real shooting star, or maybe more like a comet, but we won’t argue: it has a small head, a long tail, we have to look up to see it, and it’s pointing toward Earth. It is a roaring bearish warning. Many traders will enter a bearish position on sight or at the latest the next day if prices open below the shooting star. It is a very reliable pattern.

The Evening Star is another favorite. It appears only at the top end of a long uptrend. This is a three bar pattern, of which the first bar is a tall white candle, signaling a strong bullish day. The middle bar will show a much smaller price range between the open and close (ie the “real body”) at or above the previous day’s high. It is as if someone has slammed on the brakes and now has stopped the car and is looking around, scanning the landscape, before continuing. The third bar will be a tall black candle, which is evidence of a strong day down, and also the fact that the trend has changed from up to down. The evening star is a generally reliable reversal pattern. Many traders will open a short position immediately after it appears. Monthly bars for Goldman Sachs, Bear Stearns and Merrill Lynch showed Evening Star patterns in their shares at the start of the last big slide.

Every trader should learn the 15+ candlestick reversal patterns and learn how to use them every day to spot reversals after they have just emerged or, better yet, when they are in the process of forming.

K-12 school meals are a problem now despite all the other challenges

Anyone who has taught K-12 knows that you can’t teach kids who are falling asleep in the classroom, and kids who are hungry aren’t very good students. In some of the poorest school districts, children arrive at school without breakfast and may not eat dinner every night. Being able to eat in the school cafeteria gives them the nutrition they need to survive. It’s not that our schools should become a babysitter, that’s not the point, but the realities exist.

It’s unfortunate that we spend so much time debating exactly what will be in all of these school lunch programs and what kind of nutrition will be in the meals. At one point we were supposed to have everything in the five food groups, but then it was decided that some of the things in the food groups were only there because of the excellent lobbying and research done by the industry associations that sell that type of food. That is a real problem.

There was an interesting article in the May 17, 2011 Wall Street Journal headlined “Spuds, on brink of being kicked out, starting cafeteria fight: Federal plan to limit potatoes on school menus draws supporters; greens from Entrance” by Jennifer Levitz and Betty McKay. The article said that; “Under the USDA proposal, school cafeterias would have to limit starchy vegetables such as potatoes, corn, peas and beans to a total of 1 cup per week for lunch.” If you are a farmer who grows potatoes, you probably disagree with this, and I have to say yes.

It seems to me that with all the crisis and controversy over school budgets, teacher layoffs, and the ever-present debate over standardized testing, we have more serious problems than potatoes, corn, and beans, which are pretty healthy. for the human diet. Unfortunately, some people believe that they will make children overweight. Apparently, the controversy arose because school cafeterias provided too many French fries to children, and many health nutritionists complained.

We recently discussed this in our think tank, and one of our members decided that we should call them “freedom fries,” as a joke, an imitation of the problems we had with France during the last Iraq war. However, it appears French fries will eventually be removed from these menus, and other starchy vegetables will be removed as well, with no real nutritional evidence or studies. It worries me that something like potatoes and corn, which have been the mainstay of the human diet for hundreds of generations depending on nationality, have done well for humans, and even children.

The real problem with juvenile diabetes and fat kids has more to do with lack of exercise than what they eat. Providing half a potato a day in school lunches actually makes a lot of sense, and potatoes don’t cost that much, so it would also help with the budget. Best of all, there are many ways to eat potatoes; French fries, French fries, mashed potatoes, hash browns, and even potato donuts as mentioned in the article, that is.

These are all serious problems, but perhaps we need to go back to the basics of teaching. There is nothing wrong with potatoes, and I hope you will consider all of this and think about it. If you have any feedback, research studies, or actual empirical data, I’d love to hear what you have to say, so please email me.

Signs and symptoms of a cheating spouse or partner

The signs and symptoms of a rebellious spouse or partner can be very subtle and hard to spot, or obvious and blatant.

1. Your Spouse suddenly becomes very interested in new music, when he or she has never shown an interest before.

2. You notice your spouse or partner commenting on a movie, you know you didn’t watch it together; like “Yeah, that was awesome” or “That movie sucked so much”, “Oh, I love the part when…”

3. Your man who has a disdain for doing laundry suddenly loves doing his own laundry; That said, he also seems to schedule his laundry soon after he gets home.

4. The classic lipstick on the collar or other parts of his shirt. Pay attention also to the unexplained shine.

5. Another obvious red flag is the smell of another man’s or woman’s cologne or perfume on clothing or hair.

6. Sex techniques and styles suddenly become extremely different and foreign to you. I’m talking outside the norm here. They may find themselves in positions they’ve never done together before, or be asked to do things they’ve never been asked to do before.

7. Sex itself can take unexpected turns with regards to frequency. Your wayward spouse may suddenly request more sex than her normal routine, or drastically refuse to want it at all.

8. Your partner’s mood has changed. You realize that he is now easily angered, quick to anger, or may deliberately fight you to justify leaving the house for a “thinking walk.”

9. You may notice that they suddenly keep their cell phones on silent and strapped to their bodies at all times; whereas before, the phone was kept on the ringer and placed safely and easily within easy reach somewhere within a room in the house.

10. You may notice that the cell phone is completely absent. He/she may be blocking the cell phone in the car entirely and not bringing it home at all.

11. Cell phone bills stop coming to the house altogether. When you look up the bill online, you see a pattern of the same number or numbers being called.

12. You had access to the mobile bill online, but the password has suddenly changed.

13. Homework and chores are neglected. You notice that your partner spends more time on the Internet or literally lounging on the couch with no interest in housekeeping. He/she is in a foggy state, thinking about the other person.

14. Time spent with family also decreases. Interest in weekend activities with you and the children, attendance at children’s sports games, time spent alone with you such as date nights, etc. are greatly reduced.

15. More and more sudden and unexplained “Business Trips” keep popping up on the agenda.

16. You notice that your partner has a drastic new interest in their appearance. You may notice a lot of new clothes, new colognes or perfumes, new haircuts, new shoes, new and different underwear being purchased.

17. You may also notice a sudden diet and exercise regimen. They may also have purchased a new gym membership to get in better shape.

18. You may notice that your internet browser history is always deleted. This is a big red flag to watch out for. Anyone who deletes everything from history has something to hide.

19. In fact, you may be accused of having an affair.

20. You notice that your partner talks and talks and talks continuously about a member of the opposite sex. He/she may even try to camouflage this person and claim that he/she is gay and there is nothing to worry about.

21. When you come face-to-face with your partner’s colleagues, you notice that they become sly and awkward in your company, often with very little to say or offering only nervous ramblings.

22. The same goes for mutual friends. If mutual friends suddenly feel awkward around you, chances are they know something’s up.

23. Use of new jargon terms. If her partner suddenly gets excited about a new form of language expression, when she has never said such words before, this is a sign and a red flag that she should pay attention to.

24. The mileage on the car does not match what it tells you is driving. If you notice a sudden upward or downward spiral of mileage in the car, there is likely a problem.

25. Suddenly you get a lot of hung up calls on your home phone; and along with this, the incoming number can be blocked from the caller end.

26. You’re suddenly left out of functions, like work parties or awards dinners; whereas before this, spouses or significant others were always welcome.

27. You find yourself suddenly inundated with unexplained gifts or offers of unusual spending sprees; they are usually not related to holidays, birthdays, etc. “Just because” gifts are nice and all, however, if your partner is usually stingy and frugal and suddenly showers you with impressive materialistic items, it may be due to feelings of guilt. You know your partner better than anyone, so if your spending on clothing suddenly skyrockets, that may be something to consider.

28. Your partner, who was once indifferent to your daily plans and activities, may suddenly make it a point to constantly ask about them. If your partner suddenly wants to know your detailed plans for a given day, such as what time you’ll be leaving home, places you’ll actually be, and what time you’ll be coming home, you may be making sure that the shoreline is clear for your own activities.

29. Your spouse, once a credit card spender with no available cash, suddenly has large sums of unaccounted for cash in their wallet.

30. Finding condoms in her purse or in her car when you’ve already had your tubes tied or are on the pill.

31. Finding male enhancement pills or viagra in your car or in your briefcase.

32. You notice on the cell phone bill that he/she is using a calling card frequently. Using a calling card on a cell phone prevents the phone company from recording the actual phone number dialed.

33. You are married, but your partner introduces you to new people (such as at a party or function) as his “first wife” or “first husband.”

34. Your partner, who doesn’t normally get a “Down There” manicure, suddenly starts waxing or shaving.

35. You start to notice the new habit of your partner leaving the wedding ring at home before going to work. This can be obvious and visible, such as in the bathroom; or you may accidentally find the ring hidden somewhere, like a cabinet. After he/she gets home, you notice that they put it back on. When confronted with this problem, you are likely to receive a lame excuse like “The ring is too tight or it hurts me at work.”

36. You notice unaccounted-for scratches, hickeys, or bruises on delicate parts of your body, such as your neck, breasts, chest, or genital areas.

37. Notice on a group-signed (work-related) greeting/party card that someone of the opposite sex signs their name with a scribbled heart at the end or signs it “Love.”

38. You find a “Just Because” thank you card from a member of the opposite sex tucked in their briefcase, thanking them for the “Special Friendship” you have and thanking them for all the “Help or Advice” they give; and that they cannot imagine life without them.

39. Items similar to unaccounted for gifts, such as special cufflinks, ties, colognes/perfume, lingerie/underwear, or jewelry appear in the home that you know you did not give to your spouse.

40. That nagging, haunting “feeling” that something isn’t right becomes constant and distracting. Instincts are rarely wrong.

41. You and your partner used to enjoy a flowing conversation, whereas now, at the end of the day, you are greeted with a murmured hello, followed by stale, stagnant conversations for the rest of the night. You notice that your partner has lost interest in sharing feelings, dreams and visions for your future together. You may literally find yourself sitting on the couch together all night with very little attention.

42. You may notice that the passenger side of the car is always refitted, which doesn’t fit your normal seating pattern; or you may find strands of hair that do not belong to you or your children inside the car.

43. You normally take family vacations together as a family, but he/she suddenly goes alone.

44. You get hit with a fit of rage by the most benign and innocent questions. You start walking on eggshells in bewilderment and are afraid to even approach your spouse with questions.

45. Your joint bank accounts suddenly have fewer deposits in them, or suddenly have large amounts of withdrawals; without your mutual consent.

46. ​​You do a Google search on their name and discover a MySpace or Facebook account they didn’t tell you about. Along with this, he does a Google search for known screen names that they have used in the past and discovers that they belong to forums of a sexual nature.

47. Likewise, you pass his name or email address into a social media search engine and find him belonging to places you never knew about.

48. You discover a secret post office box that they have rented. Along with this, you may notice incoming bills, especially credit card bills that no longer appear at your home address. Also note that bills may be mailed directly to your office rather than to your home.

49. You were once free to go back and forth on your home computer only to discover that your spouse has set up a password-sensitive security system that you can no longer access. He/she can create dual accounts on the same PC, but her/his own account may suddenly become inaccessible.

50. You notice that he/she has set up a remote desktop location account on the PC and is accessing another computer entirely from home.

Is their role in the marriage reversed?

What do you get when an emotionally immature man marries an emotionally immature woman? Answer: role change. The phenomenon is widespread! Role reversal in marriage is so common that the reality sounds real in her own house, or very close to it! Almost everyone knows a family member or friend in a reverse marriage.

Role reversal in marriage is usually analyzed from the point of view of inequalities in education, income, and housework. Bruce’s story is a great example.

“Our marriage is upside down and backwards. I’m the stay-at-home dad. Between the four kids, including our nine-year-old son Asher, I’ve changed 14,000 diapers. I do the laundry, the cleaning and most of the cooking. I worry about every cough and nose bleed.

Roni is a corporate lawyer. He loves power tools, hardware stores, barbecue pits, and playing the stock market. She warns me not to jump every time someone hurts their knee so I don’t end up with a house full of crybabies. She organizes, plans and strategizes. But even though she is Generalissimo Momma, we fight over who is in control.” (Ms. Magazine, June 2003)

According to Bruce, Roni was more educated, earning triple his income (and tripling his hours away from home), leaving him largely responsible for taking care of the children and housework.

Bruce’s story captures the easily observable things that often happen in role reversal marriages. The unbridled emotional content in these types of relationships is rarely controlled. For many couples it is the unaddressed emotional reality at work and its disappearance. Even though Bruce’s relationship seems to work for them, notice her last sentence: “But even though she’s the Generalissimo Mom, we struggle to see who’s in control.” Perhaps Generalissimo Momma is a funny, but endearing nickname.I do not think so! The words that follow, “we fight over who’s in control,” hint at an emotionally charged relationship.

It’s not the chores that attract partners. In many cases, an emotionally responsible and secure husband or wife can separate what she does from who she is. But for the emotionally immature it is not so. It’s how we feel about homework. It is how we feel when performing the task. It is the tension between what God created us to be versus what we were raised and socialized to be. Over the last 20 years, as a counselor and pastor, I have spoken with hundreds of husbands and wives. Many experience role reversal. Spouses undergoing a role reversal tend to be diplomatic, hospitable, and understanding. On the other hand, wives married to these husbands are commonly goal-oriented, focused, and dependent. All these features are positive and useful.

The irony is that Jesus was all of these things. Husbands and wives fight to preserve their respective qualities when each can have them all. Think of these qualities as a right and left hand. Almost everyone has a dominant hand. It’s the one we use all the time. When threatened, the dominant hand defends almost without fail. The subordinate hand is the last resort. We have it. Works. we use it. Sometimes, in low-risk situations, the sub hand makes a cameo. But above all, it is in use only when necessary. Immediate relief comes in a role reversal marriage, when one spouse begins to engage the subordinate hand. But for most, this simple idea is laced with fear and is therefore avoided altogether. Unfortunately, this contributes to emotional toxicity.

Each of the above characteristics has a toxic side for which Jesus died on the cross. Toxicity occurs when the strength of the husband and wife builds to the point that it dominates interactions and the spouse is unable to process what is happening quickly or deeply enough to achieve emotional stability. Failure to adapt to pressure results in emotional injury. Repeated injuries erode both the relationship and, more importantly, the desire for relationship. Toxicity in husbands appears non-confrontational, passive aggressive, and avoidant. For wives, toxicity shows up as aggressive, controlling, and inflexible behaviors.

The main cause of emotional toxicity is the overfeeding of strengths. We do this in a variety of ways. For most of us, our strengths are used at work and play. Constant use of our strengths strengthens them. Another way to gobble up our strengths is by associating exclusively with those who share them. In addition, our strengths are enhanced when we maintain unfavorable attitudes towards those who do not have them.

There is another discovery I made about husbands and wives in emotionally invested marriages. In fact, they have some underlying things in common. These shared characteristics are axes of emotional immaturity. They prevent us from growing. They are especially evident in toxic relationships. Some things that invested husbands and wives have in common are: fear, anger, and distrust. For example, a husband often fears abandonment. A wife fears rejection. A husband is usually angry with himself for giving away his power to another. A wife is angry with others for abusing the power that has been assigned to them. Such husbands do not rust themselves, while their wives do not trust others.

Both husbands and wives in emotionally invested marriages are rebellious against authority. Husbands often refuse to take God-given authority and wives usurp God-given authority. Perhaps the best way to begin reordering emotionally charged, role-reversed marriages is to explore the things that husbands and wives have in common. It would certainly contribute to a solid dialogue. And I don’t think either husband or wife would covet bragging rights in such a conversation!

Singing – Get incredible control of your voice with “Swell Scales”

More control is something every singer wants. This fantastic little exercise works like a charm. It is gentle and soothing to the vocal chords and offers a clear voice with a lot of control.

The smallest sound possible

For the purposes of this exercise, we will assume that you are already familiar with diaphragmatic breathing and have it under control. (If you don’t, go ahead and learn that first.)

We will choose to sing the vowel “E”. So to begin with, you want to make the smallest sound possible. Once you’ve done that, add power to that “E” and crank it up until you get a big, powerful sound. Then lower it back down, with the same small sound you started with.

You should feel the swelling in your abdominal muscles as well as in your diaphragm. You should have the feeling that your whole body swells with each note. Make sure you have a nice strong swell at the top.

what you are trying to achieve

First, focus on getting a tiny, tiny sound. Depending on where you are in your singing development will determine how much difficulty or ease you have. It’s nice to have someone by your side telling you to aim for a smaller and smaller sound. If you don’t have anyone, it’s helpful to sign up. The sound should be barely audible.

His second point of focus is on the smoothness of his waves. Imagine a round shape with a point, like a Christmas tree ornament, that is the shape of your sound. You want your swell to be smooth and even, so gradual that it’s difficult to detect where its volume is increasing.

Split it into two halves, the first half of the swell and then the second. Most singers find the second much more difficult. They barely have much curve in the second half, the shape of the sound would be like a crooked Christmas tree ornament. So after you’ve perfected the first half, focus on the second half.

And again, most find the ending more difficult than the beginning, so I usually focus on the latter, after the rest start to come.

So for the exercise you play a note and then after the note you sing the note and swell. Then he plays the second note and then he sings. This way you go up the ladder. Singing after the note and not with it allows you to hear clearly and focus on getting that tiny sound. I usually just use “doh” to “soh”, instead of the whole scale.

So depending on how difficult you find each focus point, you may want to spend weeks on one point, for example, perfecting the level of the entry note. It varies a lot from student to student.

Level one

At level one, go very slowly and take a long time on each swell. Spend approximately 6 seconds in each swell. When I first start a student on this exercise, I usually don’t do it for more than five or ten minutes, due to the high concentration required.

level two

Once you are achieving some success and have practiced all the focus points, you are ready for level two. At level two, we move much faster through the ladder, spending around two seconds on each swell. Because we are going faster, the magnitude of the swell is also reduced.

Benefits of this exercise

Besides the wonderful benefit of gaining control over your voice, this exercise has a very special benefit. It can soothe a scratchy, raw throat. I have brought an almost hoarse voice to the point where it can sing, using the swell scale exercises. It takes time, hours if your throat is in very bad shape.

So if you’re already singing or just learning to sing, these “swollen scales” are a little gem. Keep them in your bag of tricks and use them often. You will be amazed with the results.

Triathlon Wetsuits: To Wear or Not To Wear

In the sport of triathlon, there is no question which sport most people have trouble with. Outside of swimming, cycling, and running, swimming causes the most problems for people by far. Whether it’s terrible form, anxiety in the water, or poor upper body strength, any weakness in swimming is tripled. If you have poor running form, you can still get by; even more so with cycling. If you’re a lousy swimmer, this will make you fight against the resistance of the water much more than necessary. It’s not uncommon to see super athletes knock out marathons with ease without being able to swim two laps in the pool without stopping.

Aside from getting a little swim coaching to help correct your form, there may be something else that can make the difference between giving up midway through the swim or finishing strong with energy to spare for the next two events of the race. .

If you’re a poor swimmer or newcomer to triathlon, listen to this… you MUST buy a wetsuit if you plan on competing. A good wetsuit will allow full range of motion in the shoulders, chest, and legs while providing maximum buoyancy. When you float higher in the water, you’ll go faster and save energy, period.

So now you know you need a wetsuit, but what type, what brand, when should you wear it, and how much should you spend?

USAT guidelines state that everyone can wear a wetsuit if the water temperature is 78 degrees or below. You can wear a wetsuit if the temperature is 79-84 degrees, but it will not be eligible for prizes. Any temperature of 85 degrees or higher, wetsuits are not allowed.

So if the water level is 78 or below, wear a wetsuit, even on a short distance sprint. You will be much faster in a wetsuit and save energy. Of course, you also have to deal with taking it off in transition-1 to the bike, but if you have a lot of practice, it will more than make up for the extra time in transition.

For those who are not strong swimmers, wetsuits can (and should) give them more confidence. Have you ever tried swimming underwater in your wetsuit? If not, try it sometime. You’ll pop like a cork! This is great for someone who is afraid of drowning.

Second, make sure you have a tri suit. It’s fun to see people wearing their body board, surf or even their SCUBA wetsuits. These are not made for our sport. So don’t look in the garage for your old wetsuit, that won’t work. These are too thick and will limit your mobility and speed in the water.

Third, it doesn’t really matter which brand you get. The main concern is whether or not it fits. You can spend all the money in the world on the best wetsuit, but if it doesn’t fit you, it will set you back. It should be snug, but it shouldn’t restrict your breathing or choke you around your neck. Too loose and water will get in and slow it down. If you try one brand and it doesn’t work for you, try another. With so many options, you’ll find one that fits.

Fourth, I like the full arms style of wetsuits. He used to have a long johns style, meaning he had long legs, but no sleeves. I thought long sleeves would limit my stroke, but they don’t. In fact, according to the manufacturer (Quintana Roo), long sleeves actually help you go faster because they increase the water that “traps” your arm as you go. It’s really up to you which type you get. Just try a few and see which one you like best.

Finally, triathlon is a very mental sport. If that carbon fiber frame makes you think you’re going faster, you are. If your new running shoes make you think you’re going faster, you do. And if your wetsuit makes you think you’re going faster, you do.