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Throughout our lives we are faced with changes and challenges. Nothing stays the same; The good times don’t last but neither do the bad. People and places come and go; the world changes and so does our place within it. To survive the changes we need to be adaptable and refocus on our goals. We may have to modify WHO we are and as we are, to face the new realities. We must strive to find opportunity in adversity. Of course, all of this is easier said than done. In this article, I’ve highlighted five key principles of mental toughness and resilience.

rational thought

We are what we think. When we change our thoughts, we change how we feel and act. Rational thought and rational beliefs are the foundation of mental strength and resilience; They help us in our goals, objectives and survival. Rational beliefs are flexible and not extreme; They are based on reality and the available evidence. The emphasis is on seeing things as they really are and keeping any negative attributes in perspective and proportion, so we don’t emotionally overreact or avoid challenges. If our thinking and beliefs are dogmatic, rigid, or extreme, we are stuck in the past and are doomed to repeat the same mistakes. The key is to ask ourselves “how does thinking or behaving in this way help me feel good or achieve my goals?”

Rational thinking is resilient thinking and helps us build our tolerance for frustration and discomfort without making “mountains of molehills” or seeing a situation as worse than it really is. The fact is that things could always be worse. Our rational thoughts and beliefs are essential for overcoming unhelpful emotions and behaviors, such as anxiety, depression, and avoidance. By changing the way we think, we change who we are, how we feel, and what we do.

Responsibility

Mental toughness means that we take ultimate responsibility for our thoughts, emotions, and behavior, along with responsibility for our decisions and the possible consequences of our actions. Events and conditions will of course have an impact and effect on us, but we are responsible for things that fall within our domain of influence. Events can only upset us if we let them. Nothing and no one can disturb or disturb us unless we give them permission to do so. We choose what we think, how we feel and what we do.

To be resilient, we must take responsibility, otherwise we will tend to see ourselves as pawns and victims. We can blame everyone and everything for our conditions instead of taking active steps to change whatever we are capable of. Sometimes we all may seek to blame the government or this or that corporation for the way our lives are, but the ultimate responsibility remains with us. Ultimately, we are in control.

Adaptability

For mental toughness and overall mental health, we need to be adaptable. We can appear mentally healthy when we adapt to the conditions around us, such as our jobs, relationships, and home. However, if these conditions change and we are unable to adapt, we risk poor mental health. Change is uncomfortable but we need to accept some discomfort and pain in order to learn, adapt and survive. If we remain static and fixed in our perspective, the world moves on and leaves us behind.

Resilient people do not see themselves as victims of change. They do not complain about “why me” and demand that bad things not happen to them. Resilient people view bad events as a normal (albeit unwanted) part of life; adjust to the new reality. Evolution favors those who can adapt to new environments and realities; we must be relentless in our adaptability, resourcefulness, and creativity to survive. This is true for individuals and organizations.

Commitment

Mental strength and commitment is having a clear idea of ​​what we want from life: our goals, objectives and purpose. If we don’t know where we are going, then any road will take us there. It’s healthy if our commitments span different areas of our lives, such as our relationships, careers, health, and home, rather than focusing on just one or two areas. It’s also helpful to engage with things outside of ourselves, such as charities, local groups, or political concerns. A key aspect of commitment is that it gives meaning to our lives. If we ask ourselves, “What is the meaning of life?” then our commitments and goals should provide the answer.

Having goals and being resilient means that we will keep going and problem solving in the face of setbacks and difficulties. When life knocks us down, we will get back up. We will tolerate short-term frustration and discomfort for our long-term gain. Resilience and persistence are key; most people just give up.

Trust

Confidence is our belief in our ability to get things done. Our confidence will vary according to different circumstances and events. For mental strength and resilience, we need to constantly increase the areas in which we feel confident. We may prefer to stay within our comfort zones, but the world changes and eventually all comfort zones will become uncomfortable. Our comfort zones become comfort traps.

To be more confident, we must be precise in our assessment of threats. If we perceive challenges as unrealistically dangerous or threatening, then we won’t take action. If we avoid failure, we also avoid success, so we must take calculated risks and step out of our comfort zones. To be resilient, we need to worry less about how others see us and what we believe they are thinking or saying about us. We need to challenge our self-imposed limits and restricted views of reality. We do not see things as they are; we only see things as we are.

I hope you find these principles useful, there is more information and articles on my website.

sincerely

Phil Pearl, clinical hypnotherapist.