Pygmy goats as pets
You cannot, not love, a pygmy goat. These highly intelligent beings appeal to all of the biological imperatives that make babies and Webster loved by all, despite generally gruesome behavior, heavy drinking and a propensity for soiling diapers, well Webster could be trained to change her own diapers, I suppose, if not. not from excessive alcohol consumption. Pygmy goats have huge heads and feet, chubby bodies, and untold cuteness that flips our internal switches to “protect the baby.”
Your reward is enough to simply sit, for hours, with a pygmy goat on your lap and gaze into their eyes as they regurgitate their rumen intake and ruminate on it. Sheep and goats produce 10 to 15 liters of saliva per day to aid in the digestive process; along with 5-10 liters of burped gas per hour. You laugh, but compare this to a cow: these excessively large animals produce more than 100 liters of saliva per day. Kindness saliva limit is approximately 50 liters of saliva per day. Less than this and one animal is cuddly, over fifty one animal just becomes too special to be held for long periods. This saliva limit essentially divides the animal kingdom into pets and table sauce.
Still, these statistical invariants define the limit of the pygmy’s inherent pet -ness. They consume prodigious amounts of cellulose to power this burping and spitting engine with maximum efficiency, and somehow the results of this digestion must fly somewhere. Conceived. Don’t imagine the pygmy goat living next to you on the couch.
Fortunately, their balls are quite small and quite hard; small round objects that are easily removed from the back cover; not so easy to tear off shaggy carpet. They cannot be house trained because they are proud animals and they are proud of their production. Dogs will kick grass over its effluent and run away, goats will sleep on it. In fact, male goats pee on themselves during mating season, as the smell drives the ladies crazy, in a good way.
Also, keep in mind that pygmy goats are prey animals; dogs and cats are predators. This distinction drives much of the goat’s behavior. Goats are like Zen in their calm alertness, but stoic and controlled in their responses. Their tails wag when they are happy, like dogs, but once they have shown signs of happiness, they return to that state of silent observation that defines much of their being. They don’t keep wagging their stupid tail for hours on end, constantly demanding that everyone know that they are the happiest thing in the history of happiness and if you are not as happy as they are because you are not. you have a real job and your car needs new tires that you can’t really afford, well, they just don’t care.
Since goats are prey animals, they always try to hide their feelings. Even when you love them so much, it hurts and you just want to make a connection, any connection, but they look back at you. This prey psychology means that they won’t tell you they’re sick until it’s almost too late. A goat that acts sick is on the verge of death. If he’s not very experienced, take him to the vet right away because he only has a few hours before this beloved pet, who just won’t share his emotions or acknowledge the depth of his feelings, is going to die at any moment. Why are you waiting, you grab the car keys, you grab the goat, you run to the door, but you know? It’s too late. You tried, but you will always have that nagging doubt, did you try hard enough, like in your last marriage? Maybe it was his fault.
Anyway, enjoy your pet. Pygmy goats, like babies, are wonderful.
Copyright 2007, Lotus Pond Media