The challenge of the insomniacs
For me, it was “welcome to motherhood.” Ready or not, I was in for a wonderful experience. But my first challenge was getting through the first few months of literally not sleeping. It was my first baby and I felt the pressure to do everything “right.” I wanted to be a perfect mom. But I quickly learned that being a parent was going to be a lifelong journey and that I would make a lot of mistakes along the way.
After frequently stumbling out of bed for middle of the night feedings, I would wake up around 6 am to my newborn crying happily for another feeding. After about three weeks of this, and then another month, I was completely exhausted! After a C-section, I immediately thought I could be Super Mom, Great Interior Decorator, and House Cleaning Company all at once, and of course I thought I could simultaneously juggle the responsibilities of a baby I was so sure would sleep. most of the time. The day and the night.
After a few restless nights, and realizing that my sweet baby hardly ever slept, day or night, I began to wonder about her. Was this going to be the norm? Did babies really stay awake for hours and demand a feeding every hour and a half? Was I doing something wrong? I couldn’t help but wonder if this pattern would ever end. I have read all the parenting articles that tell you when your baby should stop waking up so often and start sleeping peacefully through the night. Well, dare I say my little one would wake up over and over for entire nights. After a few months, I began to think that she was the only mother suffering from severe sleep deprivation! Of course, I knew I REALLY wasn’t the only one, but she sure comes home to you when she happens to you.
My little girl is now an active toddler, and things have definitely picked up when it comes to her sleeping habits, but I learned quite a bit during those seemingly endless sleepless nights and days of extreme fatigue. If she had to do it all over again, she definitely wouldn’t have tried to be the Great Interior Designer and House Cleaning Company (and after a C-section)! Here are some helpful tips that I should have used and will keep in mind when I have my next baby:
or Rest, rest, rest! Okay, it sounds hackneyed, and during pregnancy you’ve probably heard everyone tell you to rest, but once you’ve given birth, it’s even more important that you stick to the rest phase for the first few days you’re home. Hospital. I can’t even begin to explain how much rest is needed after a C-section…but with any type of delivery, your body needs time to recover, so take it easy. What does rest mean? It could mean using paper plates so there are fewer dishes to wash. It could mean having a friend or relative come sit with you for a few hours each day and help with chores (which is especially helpful if you have other, younger children). And if you have older children, it could mean helping out with more chores around the house. Above all, it means simply letting go of some things. You don’t need to dust right away…maybe you can wait a few more days, or even weeks.
o People say to sleep while the baby is sleeping. Well, that didn’t work for me, mainly because I was trying to do things around the house that I couldn’t do efficiently when my daughter was awake. So here’s what I say: REST while baby sleeps. Sit down, take a break. Schedule that time and give yourself at least 30 minutes to do absolutely nothing.
o Thicken baby’s milk. I breastfed my daughter for several months. At first, nurses would tell me that breastfed babies need to be fed more frequently because breast milk apparently “goes right through” their systems. After my daughter was a few weeks old, I was given the go-ahead to thicken her breast milk with rice cereal (about a teaspoonful). She did wonders for her nightly waking ritual. Instead of waking up every hour and a half, she slept about two hours longer than usual. I say that’s good for mommy and baby! Of course, check with her pediatrician first, and again, there are different views on thickening baby’s milk, so do (or don’t do) what you think is best.
o Breastfeeding mothers take a break. For breastfeeding mothers, I highly recommend pumping so other family members can bottle feed your baby while you rest. Breastfeeding is demanding work and requires quite a few energy reserves. Did you know that you burn approximately 500 calories during a nursing session? That’s equivalent to the number of calories I burned on the treadmill a few days ago. So there’s another reason for you to take a breather.
o Take your prenatal vitamins. Keep taking these. You will need them, especially during this recovery time. Your body needs all the necessary minerals and vitamins to boost your immune system and promote overall health. You’ll be glad you took them every day.
o Continue eating for two. If you’re breastfeeding, this is an especially important concept, as you’ll need to eat enough to keep your milk supply flowing. It is very easy for postpartum women to want to start dieting right after giving birth. However, the healthiest option is to simply continue eating nutritious foods and eating enough to keep your energy levels up, because you will definitely need energy in the early morning hours! Additionally, doctors recommend that lactating and postpartum women eat between 2,000 and 2,400 calories per day. So eat, and eat healthy.
o Keep others in your life. Never feel alone or isolated. If you don’t have family nearby who can help you, seek help within your community: churches, civic groups, and nonprofit organizations, as well as friends. Additionally, there are plenty of online communities and discussion groups specifically geared toward pregnancy and parenting-related topics that are helpful to new moms.
Above all, do the things you love the most: reading, meditating, writing, and doing crafts. Do something you really enjoy every day as much as you can. In time, her baby will begin to sleep through the night and one day she will realize that she can finally get her “z” back.